Friday, January 27, 2012

Tired? I don't think so Prick...

So as I have lamented in previous blogs I am a full time hammer swinging, heavy load moving (out of the gutters boys...and gals), lift operating, scenic carpenter. This job makes you sleepy. Makes you want to fall into the arms of a Bukowski type binge as well...but we digress...
Last night I was trying to sleep and ZODIAC came on. First off David Fincher could poo on a reel of film and I would go see it and sing it's praises. Regardless, Zodiac is good. It is one of his more under the radar films and also, a kind of slow burn that kept my blood shot scenic carpentry eyes riveted.
This motivated me to bring you:

MOVIES THAT F*CK YOUR SHIT UP BECAUSE YOU FIND THEM ON WHEN YOU SHOULD BE SLEEPING BUT THEN YOU HAVE TO WATCH...MOVIES.


1. ZODIAC

I already said it so it is an easy #1. We get post meltdown pre-Iron Man Downey Jr.
We also get Jake Gyllenhaal before he hit and quick Taylor Swift (Dear Jake, you have to stick around an train a young lady dude... you can't just break up with her. Not America's sweeheart...jerk hole. She sings about "Love" man.  Capital "L". I mean you expect her to be a cat in the sack right away...Sorry, not gonna happen...thanks for reading Jake. ) which is good because he is good. We also get Elias Koteas, one of the most underrated and inconspicuous character actors around...all wrapped in the over exposed goodness of a Fincher Murder Story. It kept me up...in a good way.


2. Notting Hill

Nothing more will be said about this. That is all. Except: "I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her." Oh, shit. Alright...


3. Shawshank Redemption


Holy shit and hallelujah. The Grand Daddy of them all. Logging in at 142 minutes this baby turns a midnight channel flip into a 2am Pink Dot delivery reeeeeal quick. (disregard this last statement if you live in New York. We can simply walk across our streets and get anything we want. Cheers.) Andy Dufresne, you my only friend...Well, you and Ellis Boy "Red" Redding.


4. Godfather 2


Now I know. By this point you're all like "Wrah Wrah you only like slow movies, Wrah Wrah...". Dude, It's f*cking Godfather 2.
"I knew it was you, Fredo. You broke my heart. You broke my heart!" 
Eveything you need to know bout being a European immigrant (or three generations removed from one) you can learn from Marlon Brado & Al Pacino. Move to New York. Capitalism sucks. Kill the family members you hate that betray you. Your Dad had a cat...doesn't mean you have to have one. Avoid toll booths.


5. The Royal Tenenbaums






This movie either evokes sighs of love or judgement. I LOVE this goddamn movie. Wes Anderson's balanced shots are about the only balance in my life. Gwyneth Paltrow in this movie is only ever bested in cinematic cuteness by a Wedding Singer Drew Barrymore. Wilson Bros incorporated...but more importantly, Gene Hackman. Let me just type that again. Gene Hackman. I can quote most every line and do often.
Me: Please consolidate these Subway cards Maam...
MTA Worker: (grumble)
Me: Please stop belittling me...you never gave me the time of day until I started getting good reviews.
MTA Worker: You got $7.50 left.
Now, there are movies as an actor/filmmaker that you watch and get frustrated by because YOU could have made them that good. Then there are those that are the perfect storm of talent and personal taste....that you can't turn off. I have given you 5.

I love you. Goodnight. Prick

3 comments:

  1. LOVE Tenenbaums. This list makes me happy and I agree. Lost Highway on (of course at 3am on IFC) keeps me up too. Then again, that seems like the only appropriate time to watch it.

    I have to show you this clip. You of all people can appreciate it Shawshank always reminds me of The Sharktank Redemption. I'm trying to find a longer clip/trailer.
    http://vimeo.com/7485216

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  2. Got one, much more complete:
    http://www.spike.com/video-clips/0b221t/the-sharktank-redemption-trailer

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  3. Dale, darling artist friend of mine. :) I gave you the versatile blogger award. I'm hoping my readers will come by and love your brilliant-ness as much as I do, and that it leads to you getting cast in another major Hollywood movie or Broadway production. Muah!

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